On Becoming a Techno-Nerd

On Becoming a Techno-Nerd...

By Clark Staten, EMT-P I/C

Do you have a computer? Do you have a mobile phone? A digital watch? A pager on your belt? Do you subscribe to at least three computer or electronics magazines? Do you have a VHF, UHF, CB, or Amateur Band Radio in your car? Is the "scanner" always on at your house? If the answer is yes to a majority of these questions....you are showing tendencies of becoming a "Techno-Nerd".

You undoubtedly just asked yourself; "How can I be Nerd?". "I played football, I have a wife/girlfriend, I drink beer, I'm not scared of anything, I have a four-wheel drive truck...and besides...I walk through walls before breakfast at work...I can't be ANY KIND of a NERD...Can I ??"

Your author WAS SURE that I wasn't any kind of "NERD" until recently. Then I began to wonder about the about the fact that I recently refused a date with a pretty blonde, so that I could work on my computer at home. I thought a second longer, and again wondered what I was doing recently, climbing on the peak of the dangerous roof of my house to position an scanner antenna so that it was "just-right". Then, on the way to work, my mobile phone and pager went off at the same time. I then had to stop and accept the fact that it was possible that I had become a "Techno-Nerd".

It's true. "Techno-Nerds" are creeping into our everyday lives. Many of us MAY have even BECOME ONE. Many of us have recently begun looking for technological solutions to problems that previously would have confused and confounded us....and we are finding them. It truely is becoming an "information age" and becoming a "Techno-Nerd" (at least to some extent) is necessary to access the wonders of modern communication and information systems.

Your author bought his first home computer (a 80286) about five years ago, and his second one (A 80386) this year. The first one languished on my work bench for several months after being purchased, without being used. After all, I had a perfectly good 1970's model Ollivetti typewriter. I then bought a "cute" (but, proprietary) word-processor, when the "writing bug" bit me. Both of these crude implements had served me well for several years. I had written and published several articles in fine magazines like this one with them. I didn't need that "new-fangled" machine to produce an article. Besides, you had to learn all of those "Disk Operating System (DOS)" commands and figure out how to get the machine to do what it was supposed to do. It seemed to be... just too much trouble.

Then it was suggested that I re-write and expand upon an article that I had written. I laboriously wrote and re-wrote the longer and longer piece...until I ran out of space on the disk for the word processor. I took to typing and "cutting and pasting" pieces of paper to each other and making photocopies at the Post Office. Rewriting and rewriting, time after time; that didn't work well either. All of the time, while I toiled with the scissors and glue, the computer sat on my work bench and mocked me with a simple.... C:\.

It was then that the startling revelation hit me! I could MAKE that computer do this "cutting and pasting" for me. After all, I had seen a T.V. program on Public Television that showed people actually controlling the entire North American Radar Air Defense (NORAD) system with a computer....it should be able to help me write a story. I sat down at the dining room table and began to read the book on the computer and it's DOS 3.0. It was terribly confusing....Megabytes, Hard drives, Floppy drives, Controllers, Applications, Interrupts, Serial ports, Parallel ports, and memory to remember. None of this had anything to do with writing the story, but now I was compelled to dominate "the machine". After all, that's all it was...wasn't it? A Machine....

What was the difference between disk space and memory? It seemed that I was always running out of one or the other. What about communications ? The book said I could "hook-up" a modem to my computer and "talk" (or type) to others and send "files" through the telephone lines. Was that possible? That I could type an article, send it over the phone, and somebody else could read it at the other end? The book said it could be done. The transformation was beginning.

Next week at the grocery store, I found a magazine rack with several computer magazines on it. The articles looked interesting and they promised being able to do phenomenal things with that "bunch of chips, transistors, and wiring" that sat on my workbench. I purchased a couple of magazines and browsed through them while watching television with my daughter. Numerous ads promised that their software would do almost anything that I desired. There were ads for accounting packages, word processing (my then current interest), communications (so that's how you do it...with software), databases, personal information managers (that sounded interesting), memory managers, and even "adult animated software. Now, we were talking... XXX rated computer files.

I then made my first trek to the friendly neighborhood computer store. I was like a "kid in a candy store". All of those programs that I had read about were right there for me to purchase; including a word processing program. I read all of the boxes and scanned all of the features. Many of them looked to difficult for me. Then I found just the right one. (In fact, this article is being written on an upgraded version of that original program.) Then for good measure, I bought several other programs that they had "ON SALE" as discontinued, or had been opened, or whatever. I rushed home and began to "install" my new "wonders".

Soon my tiny 20 MB hard disk "groaned" under the weight of numerous utility, communication, graphics, and other miscellaneous programs that I had acquired. After finding a communications program that was almost workable, I discovered the world of computer communications. After numerous false- starts, I was finally... "On-line" and soon downloaded about a thousand other programs that I didn't need. But, It didn't matter. I was MAKING the computer work. And, yes....I did get the article finished....it eventually became a book.

By then, I was "hooked". The computer magazines began to arrive at my house like clockwork. Soon additional advertisements and catalogs began to arrive for electronic components, radios, software, antennas, and a multitude of other "Techie" equipment. Everyday, new and enticing products were presented in the privacy and comfort of my own home. Soon, I knew the United Parcel Service man by his first name.

Then, it wasn't good enough to go answer the phone....I either answered it with a handheld portable or let my answering machine and computer do the talking. Booting up my computer when I wasn't home would cause by "beeper" to go off. Then, I HAD to have a car phone...after all, what if I missed a call. Besides, it was soon becoming the status symbol of the late 80's and early 90's. I began to understand the differences between UNIX, OS/2 and DOS. I began to look down for my pocket pen protector.

Then it happened......

I became really crazed, and began to develop a plan to have my computer answer the phone and share ideas and software with others. It was called a "Bulletin Board Service (BBS)". Now... I knew I was gone. I suddenly had a terrible inclination to wear white socks, tape my glasses, and carry a holster and slide rule. I must be "over the edge"...only "Techno-Nerds" knew about such things, and I wasn't a "Techie" or a "Nerd".... was I ?

The rest of my life seemed complicated, but fairly normal. However, technology continued to intrude. The last straw found me at a computer store buying the second computer that I mentioned earlier. I had drooled over a "386" with extended memory, as the BBS continued to take over my first computer love. It had finally happened....after much technical discussion about the capabilities of the new system, the purchase of my second computer was completed. I was thrilled that I knew as much or more about computers as the salesman that sold it to me. It then dawned on me. I defintely had become a "Techno-Nerd".

Now that I have accepted it, the notion is not so bad. I am now able to accomplish many tasks that I never would have attempted before. My writing is now (most of the time) improved by a "spell and grammer checker". I can manipulate text and numbers to provide me with an effective accounting and database system. Computer communications have allowed me access to a wealth of information that helps me in my job and at home.

I have discarded many non-productive programs that were of little use to me. I've learned to use my computer equipment for the betterment of myself and my family. My daughter now uses it for her school work. My Bulletin Board has grown, with additional phone lines, and I have made several new friends while "on-line". I am now teaching others about the wonders of computers and enjoying the process. There is so much that can be learned in the world and the computer allows me an intelligent and rapid alternative to personal exploration. I don't think I have really changed.........just grown.

I guess if somebody wants to call me a "Techno-Nerd"... .....it's alright with me.

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